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What Is Your Superpower

Are You Wasting Your Superpower?

Ask anyone on the street what superhero’s superpower they wish they had and I’m sure we’d hear things like mind-reading, being invisible, super strength, lightning speed, the ability to fly or, perhaps, the ability to leap tall buildings in a single bound. Above all, it’s fun to think about what life would be like if adventure and triumph were around every corner.

The most interesting thing to me is what we choose to do with the powers given to us as our birthright.  Think about it, many of our powers look the same from the outside, but from the inside we possess superpowers that are uniquely ours.

So with all the potential superpower that lies within us, why do so many of us squander it away?

For instance, I recently had a discussion in one of my workshops about a woman’s desire to lose weight.  She explained to me that she really wanted to lose the weight because it would help her feel better about herself.  Not to mention, she’d be setting a better example for her kids.  We talked about what she believed was holding her back.  It was clear to me that there wasn’t enough tension around her desire to lose weight that would catapult her into action. Meaning, she really didn’t want it bad enough, which ties right back into my point about our superpowers.

Think of every superhero’s tale.    They only bolt into action when chaos and stress magnify the tension on the lever within them.  Like when innocent people are being tormented by the hair-raising villain whose destruction upon Metropolis seems imminent.   This is when Clark Kent rips open his white pressed dress shirt and before the buttons have time to hit the ground, he morphs into Superman ready to save the day. 

Now I’m not trying to be funny here…okay…maybe just a little bit, but we work the exact same way.  We make a lot of excuses, get mildly comfortable and we get stuck. Bam! That’s the real reason we’re not living our best lives. When we finally become sick and tired of being sick and tired that’s when we use our superpowers.  When we feel broken, that’s when we use our superpowers. When we don’t have enough money to make ends meet, that’s when we use our superpowers.  When our pants no longer fit, that’s when we use our superpowers and on and on. 

So instead of waiting for tension to be thrust upon you in order to utilize the superpowers that lie within you, imagine yourself at the end of your life.  Ask yourself if you put your superpowers to good use during your lifetime.  If you think you could have used your superpowers more, then start learning how to tap into those powers right now.  

But how?

One of the best ways to create villainous tension in your life is to imagine if you ‘don’t’ do something what that may look like in your life moving forward. For example, imagine if you don’t get a grip on your expanding waistline.  Will you soon look like the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man that was destroying New York City in the Ghostbusters (1984) motion picture? Will you have to lay flat on the ground to get your pants buttoned or be subject to elastic waistbands the rest of your days?   By stimulating your imagination through your brain’s visual cortex you also stimulate your brain’s amygdala and the amygdala means business.  This is the fight or flight center of your brain…call it __________________(Fill in your superhero name here).  This simple act of creating tension through using your imagination will quickly have you leaping tall buildings in a single bound!

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The Life of Joaquín “El Chapo” Guzmán…My Thoughts

My husband and I recently finished watching the Netflix series El Chapo, about the life of Joaquín “El Chapo” Guzmán, a Mexican drug lord who started trafficking as far back as the 1980s. 

I must admit that I’m not a huge T.V. buff; however, this series had me hook, line and sinker.  Don’t get me wrong, Guzmán is shear evil in my eyes but the psychology behind the man and the world he immersed himself, fascinates me.  Guzmán has admitted to killing somewhere between 2,000 to 3,000 people all for his own personal gain and power. 

And furthermore, he easily corrupted large portions of local police municipalities, U.S. DEA Agents, government officials and Mexico’s president with millions and millions of dollars in hush money.  It came out in the news this week that the president of Mexico, Enrique Pena Nieto may have received up to $100 million dollars from Guzmán, which bought him his freedom and continued operations. 

Now let’s consider the destruction his products have had on the United States and our vulnerability to fall victim to the destruction of drugs like cocaine, heroine and methamphetamine.  Illicit drugs have been on a steady increase in our country since the early 2000s and having witnessed an uncle’s life on drugs, it’s a self-sabotaging, destructive life to live.  I’m betting we all know someone who has been negatively affected by the desolation of drugs.

We are losing the war on drugs because we’re focused on the wrong part of the funnel.  We need to focus more on the top of the funnel…meaning a drug lord only has a business if he has customers.  It’s impossible to continually fill the top of the funnel when you focus on wellness in a society. Why take drugs if you already feel good?   If we fail to teach social and emotional wellness, what is going to change?  Nothing! 

We turn to drugs so that we can easily change our state and, for many, numb our emotional pain.  Our youth often take drugs to gain status and power amongst their peers.  If we don’t know, as a culture, how create wellness from the inside out and if we do not teach our children from young ages the social and emotional skills associated with wellness, then how in the world do we expect our children, friends, family members and co-workers to stop jumping into the top of the funnel?

The way I see it is focus on more drugs and you get more drugs, focus on teaching wellness and self-advocacy and we have a much better chance to put people like Joaquín “El Chapo” Guzmán out of business.

Agree?  Please share… 

#ElChapo #Guzmán #Drugs #wellness #SEL

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Why Starting Fresh This New Year May Be Harder than it Sounds

For most of us the New Year brings hope for a brighter tomorrow. Deep in our core we are all striving to improve our personal story. We want to look great, feel great emotionally and have enough money to experience all the things we dream of. It’s a pretty simple formula…right? And I’d be the first one to champion you to reach for the stars this new year, but the bitter fact of the matter is, for most of us, not much will change unless we learn to create new patterns and habits in our lives. I’m guessing that last sentence may not sound that encouraging but hear me out because there is a simple solution…

I read once that habits are both a blessing and a curse. I completely agree and let me tell you why. Our daily habits make life predictable, which in turn gives us daily direction and, for the vast majority of us, keeps us alive another day. That’s a blessing. But the primitive ‘fight or flight’ part of our brain loves predictability and absolutely disdains change and that can be a curse. But why?

The simple reason our brains find change so uncomfortable is because our brains do not have to work hard when daily routines are predictable. Think back a million years ago when our survival depended on our ability to avoid being eaten for dinner by a saber-toothed tiger. Our brains had to work on over drive. But we are not designed to sustain this degree of heightened response for long periods of time. Thus, the reason our brains love habits and predictability. They allow our brain to relax. And one last point…although the saber-toothed tiger is long gone from being an ongoing human threat, we still are driven by this primitive part of our brains which makes change and personal development very challenging. Predictability equals survival but it does not necessarily equal quality of life.

So how do we create lasting change and improve the quality of our lives when the primitive part of our brain stubbornly does not want us to change? 
Well the answer may be easier than we think. Knowing that this part of our brain loves predictability and hates change, the number one way to respect the role it plays in our survival is to work with it…not against it. That means slowing into the change you desire little by little by doing very small motivated task daily. Let me put some context around this so it makes this lesson come to life.

Ten months ago, a client of mine, who struggled terribly with procrastination and felt very stuck in her life, took on a very simple challenge I helped her create. She was tasked with caring for one procrastinated item a day. They were very small task that took only minutes to complete. Before long she painlessly found herself doing more and more towards her desired goal. Ten months later her life has transformed. By taking small, manageable daily steps towards her larger goal, she tricked the primitive part of her brain and is continuing to win it over.

And what’s great is we can all do the same thing. So remember, if the predictability of your life is not serving you, then there is a solution. Start taking small, consistent daily inspired action and watch your life transform in 2019.

By: Dena Betti
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